Walking In (Blogoversary edition)

Have you ever walked into a room and thought "They're playing my song"? Think Bethenny Frankel and the way she struts into the studio of her new talk show to Calling All My Girls. What song would you choose?

Nov 2008

When I started my blog 4 years ago, I would have said "Unwritten" by Natasha Bedingfield because I was on the verge of so many changes with my upcoming lap band surgery. I was numb to a lot of things in life, including relationships, feelings, even my own body. I was probably living only half the life God intended for me.

It's been a long journey, but I'm happy to recap:

• I've lost and kept off over 50 pounds.
• I'm celebrating 14 years of marriage this October to the sweetest, most supportive, and funniest man I know.
• I have a great relationship with our now 8yo son who reminds me every day to celebrate life and learning.
• I've watched God grow some dormant talents and interests in the past year since starting my company Mommy Forward, LLC and organizing Chester County's Best Kept Secrets Tour.
• My growing support system [family, friends, mentors, and peers] keeps me encouraged.

Yet the journey's far from over. I'm still working on:

• Eating mindfully, exercising regularly, and losing 35 more pounds
• Growing as a wife, mom, and homemaker
• Effectively using my talents and influence for the good of others

But when I walk into a room now, I hear "Make It Happen" by Mariah Carey.

I held on to my faith, I struggled and I prayed. And now I've found my way.
If you believe in yourself enough and know what you want,

You're gonna make it happen. Make it happen.
And if you get down on your knees at night and pray to the Lord,

He's gonna make it happen. Make it happen.

Free Printable

August 2012

I'm walking into the plans God has

for my future. Together we'll

Make it happen!

Growing Pains and Pleasures

"Happiness is neither virtue nor pleasure nor this thing or that,

but simply growth. We are happy when we are growing."

- William Butler Yeats

Every year our writers group members pick a word and a verse for the year. My word for 2012 is Harvest along with the following verses from Psalm 1:

Blessed is the (wo)man
Who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly,
    Nor stands in the path of sinners,
    Nor sits in the seat of the scornful;
² But (her) delight is in the law of the Lord,
    And in His law (s)he meditates day and night.
³ (S)he shall be like a tree
    Planted by the rivers of water,
    That brings forth its fruit in its season,
    Whose leaf also shall not wither;
And whatever (s)he does shall prosper.

The funny thing is - before the harvest there needs to be growth. And growing is painful!

• Try starting and growing a business with limited finances.
• Try growing a child with challenges.
• Try growing a weight loss when time, poor habits, and biology are stacked against you.
• Try growing a healthier life after injuries from the collision that totaled your car.
• Try growing beyond years of self-doubt and insecurities - only to find yourself in a sales position (and you typically detest them.)

Although difficult, I pushed through these challenges and I GREW!

• I created Mommy Forward, LLC and organized the first Chester County's Best Kept Secrets Tour, selling over 900 tickets and generating thousands of dollars in sales for local businesses.
• I cheered our son on to tremendous progress academically and socially.
  
• I re-committed myself to weight loss, and the scale is moving in the right direction again.
• I got treatment for my auto injuries, can extend forgiveness to the other driver (most days), and survived the car renting, buying, and insurance frustrations.
  
• I counteract negative self-talk with prayer, praise, gratitude, and the support of family, friends, and my personal development team.

Sure, my celebration is part "I did it!" but mostly "God did it!" He brings the "fruit" and the "prosper" in spite of my best efforts. And I don't believe in success for success' sake. If I rise and prosper, I want to take everyone with me. That's been my goal for Chester County's Best Kept Secrets Tour, local business owners (including myself) working together to strengthen the community and the local economy.

I often say I was fine being the fat girl in the corner. Then God said "no" and pushed me forward. Now my days include sales calls, magazine photo shoots, articles, ads, and even networking. September Tour, here I come!

I guess this Mommy Forward is one happy-to-be-growing girl.

 
Photo: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Questioning Jesus

Have you ever questioned Jesus? Or does just the thought make you gasp? If good communication marks a healthy relationship, then dialoguing with Jesus - even questioning Him - seems healthy, right? After all, Jesus loved questions. That's how He handled the woman at the well, the chief priests, and countless others with whom He interacted.

But the question He posed to a chronically ill man struck a nerve in me, "Do you want to get well?" (see John 5:6.) I imagined myself questioning back, "Duh, Jesus, of course he wants to get well! He's tired of living this way. He came to see You, didn't he? What other proof do You need? Sheesh!"

Sure, the man wanted to get well. But how much so? He had traveled to the edge of the pool only to make excuses. No one was there to help him. Other people got ahead of him. Blah, blah, blah. Jesus challenged him to get up, walk, and take an active role in his healing.

Today I stare at a photo of myself from 50 pounds ago and ask, "Michele, do you want to get well?" My heart replies, "Duh, of course I want to get well! I'm tired of living this way. I had lap band surgery, didn't I? What other proof do I need? Sheesh!"

Sure, I wanted to lose weight, gain energy and confidence, and improve the quality of my life. But how much so? Perhaps I, too, have traveled to the edge of wellness only to make excuses. The band hasn't been as successful as I'd hoped and I've made all of the changes I'm willing to make.

In some ways, I'm like a sailor who dropped their boat in the water but refused to study the wind, raise the sail, and steer. To that I might question, "Why are you going to choose failure when success is an option?" (one of my favorite quotes from Jillian Michaels.)

If I'm completely honest with myself, Jesus is challenging me to take the next steps toward wellness: to practice mindful eating, become disciplined with my calories, and exercise more. I guess that's why pointing a finger at someone else always ends with pointing several fingers back at me.

A heartfelt note on healing: If given the option, we would probably all choose complete healing. But life doesn't work that way. Often times, like the apostle Paul, we face difficult circumstances that cannot be willed or prayed away. Whatever you're facing, I don't belittle your pain or imply that you lack faith enough to change it. Instead, because of my own painful experiences, I offer a hug and a prayer for enduring strength. 

Image: Dominic Harness / FreeDigitalPhotos.net